The Chairman

May 2020

A vital part of the behind the scenes operation at Ask Tony Quiz HQ is The Chairman. Before each virtual quiz he inspects the monitors and laptops, admittedly in quite an unconventional way. 

Born with a front leg abnormality, getting to desk height is not easy. First he has to jump from the carpet on to the union jack chair. From there he makes his way after several attempts to land aboard the Costco desk, Then it is a short hop up to the equipment.

Once in position The Chairman rubs his right ear against the four corners of each device, presumably to check for correct electrical current. If things are working well, The Chairman will emit a small rumble of appreciation. If things are in 100% condition, that rumble will grow louder after a few seconds to become a full-on purr.

The Chairman has really come into his own during lockdown and has adapted into his new assistant producer role without any complaint. Previously his days were mainly spent next door in the producer’s bedroom, asleep on the chair. Fond of a feed, particularly anything by Sheba, his numerous meals a day are only interrupted by the occasional chase of a fly, wasp, or when feeling particularly brave, a giant hornet. Due to his leg situation, his attempts to pursue and catch the birds in the garden are often thwarted when the prey climb more than 3 feet off the ground. But a fly against a windowsill, particularly one daring to swoop low, has no chance.

The patience of The Chairman is often tried by his family members who insist on calling him different names at different times of day. Originally christened Harry, people quickly got confused as to the origins. Was it after the marvellous England football captain Harry Kane? A grandfather remains convinced he is named after the weather feature Hurricane and addresses him as Hurri. A recent Marvel film featuring a doppelganger briefly led to a spell where The Chairman was known as Goose The Cat. And even that got shortened to GTC.

But ahead of virtual lockdown quiz 45 tonight, whatever he is called, The Chairman will be in position.